When I went in I was stiff and nervous.
Everything looked exactly as it did on TV.
Everyone was so attractive
at the Grey’s Anatomy Hospital.
Everyone had such compelling lives
at the Grey’s Anatomy Hospital.
The Psychiatrist who signed off on my surgery
was sleeping with
the surgeon who did my consultation.
They bonded during an episode a few weeks earlier
where they performed open heart surgery
on a notorious serial killer
saving his life
even though one of them was a psychiatrist
and the other was very emotionally conflicted.

The surgeon said something
about how
they’d done top surgery in season 7
on a cis boy.
And I thought,
good for him.
Good for him.

When you get top surgery
at the Grey’s Anatomy hospital
you’re the least important person in the room.
The doctors are all making eyes at each other
over your unconscious body.
Or passive aggressive remarks
to their workplace frenemies
as they slice open your chest.
It’s the first day
of the rest of your life.
But for them
it’s just another day
at the Grey’s Anatomy hospital.

There was a minor hiccup.
A patient had a gun lodged inside his knife wound
and it went off
in the ER
injuring the surgeon
who was supposed to do my top surgery.
But he insisted on doing it anyway.
I think he thought, if he couldn’t remove my tits
he’d have failed his patient.

I like that the doctors care
at the Grey’s Anatomy hospital.
I like that they have opinions
and feelings
and not just blank stares.
I like that they cry
and scream
and fuck in the medical supply closets.
Most of all, I like that
at the Grey’s Anatomy hospital
I was not the focus.
It was the first day of the rest of my life
but isn’t every day?
Isn’t every day an opportunity
to change
to grow
to embrace the old and become something new?
When I got top surgery
at the Grey’s Anatomy Hospital
I got to be the guest star
but then I went home
to live my quiet life
and think my quiet thoughts.
And the doctors continued.
And the hospital continued.
And everyone continued.
Without thinking of me ever again.
Except maybe to mention
to the next person who gets top surgery
at the Grey’s Anatomy Hospital
that they did this in a previous episode
and it went well.
Good for him,
the next person will think.
Good for him.